Adoption

What in the World is God doing?

As I stare at a blank page unsure of where to even begin, I quietly ask the Lord, “What is your heart for this community? What do you have to say to these ladies and families?”

As we wrap up National Infertility Awareness Week (NIAW), do I write something for the mom who has never met her babies because of miscarriage? Or maybe to the family who just decided on adoption. Or what about to the ladies who are just starting their “ttc journey” and going through what we like to call “delayed fertility.” Or maybe I’ll write to everyone with “unexplained infertility.” Wait, no, I have it- I should write to the woman who’s truly infertile. She like really never had children. She’s gone through menopause. And she has told God “no thank you” on that Sarah miracle. Yes, maybe I should write to her. Or to the mom who has a child at home but is struggling with guilt and shame and- oh yes- secondary infertility. She definitely needs a pick-me-up. Who am I even writing to, Lord?

So I come back to my quiet questions with the Father. God, what is your heart for this community? What do you have to say to these ladies and families? Because I don’t want to write another article just for the sake of another awareness week.

Well I believe He has ALOT to say and here’s what He dropped on my heart.

It doesn’t matter if you’re literally infertile or considering adoption or already have kids at home but about to start yet another round of IUI. It doesn’t matter if you’ve had 7 failed IVF’s or your husband has no sperm or you’re battling cervical cancer. It doesn’t matter how much money is in your bank account or your HSA. It doesn’t matter how many eggs you have, what shape your uterus is, or what size your cysts are. It doesn’t matter how many recurrent miscarriages you’ve had or that you can’t seem to get past the 1st trimester. It doesn’t matter if you’ve never conceived, and you know what?!- It doesn’t matter if your issue is so bad that it didn’t even make this list!

And here’s why!

God’s not intimidated by the list I just gave.

God is not upstairs biting His nails wondering “How do I get her out of this mess?!"

He is not preoccupied or too busy for your issue.

He has not forgotten you or stopped listening to you or put your mail at the bottom of the stack to deal with later.

God is not worried and He’s not confused.

He’s not scared or rushed or hopeless.

He hasn’t pressed pause on your story, and He hasn’t misplaced your prayer request.

He hasn’t rejected or abandoned you or your dreams.

He isn’t dangling bait or trying to tease you. It’s just not in His nature.

He didn’t give you the wrong child or mess up during conception, and He didn’t kill your baby. Nope, He sure didn’t.  

 

Here’s what He IS doing!

He’s showing compassion in tangible ways!

He’s healing cancer and endometriosis.

He’s dissolving cysts. He’s distributing peace and wisdom into your situation.

He’s creating sperm from nothing.

He’s reshaping and repositioning wombs.

He’s carefully preparing your heart for your promise.

He’s creating life and redeeming loss.

He’s re-arranging people and situations and schedules on your behalf.

He’s calming the storm.

 

He’s reaching out His hand for you.

He’s moving mountains into the sea!

He’s raising dry bones and wounded hearts and dead dreams!

He’s handing out freedom.

He’s answering prayers and He’s speaking!

He’s working on your behalf!!!

 

So here’s to raising awareness not just for infertility, but for a God bigger than infertility. I hope this week we see more miracle stories than anything else... in order to stir hope in this community and create an atmosphere for miracles to be duplicated!!

If you are anywhere on the “infertility” spectrum... we hope you’ll stick around and dig through our resources. We hope you’ll find community in our online groups. We hope you’ll be encouraged by our social media posts. But mostly we hope you’ll be pointed to Jesus and refueled in your hope!


 

Choosing Adoption

We discussed adoption before I took out my Nuvaring and starting trying for a family. It felt 100 years away, but looking back, I know God was preparing our hearts for a unique way to grow our family. After we’d been trying to conceive for almost 2 years, we went through a series of fertility testing and the results were devastating.

We didn’t really have an option for fertility treatments. I would have given everything at the time for even a 15% chance of conception, but in hindsight, I’m so grateful that the door was closed and locked. I would have spent years trying to break down that door to experience pregnancy, but instead God directed us back to adoption.

I remember that conversation with my husband so well after his results came back. We went to Market Street, ordered a beer and stared at each other for a while. When I look back at that meeting, I’m so amazed at our initial response. We knew that God was asking us to adopt, and we knew that there was a little girl out there that needed us as a family (it’s so sweet, we always saw our first as a daughter which is what God gave us).

Our purpose is to give God glory, and he will do what he does in our life for his glory. Our story includes the beautiful gift of adoption, and it was hard, oh gosh, it was hard. I know that God could miraculously give us a biological child, but in the meantime, he’s given me a heart for the child without a family.

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God used infertility to grow our family through adoption. His miracle was that he brought the most beautiful (if you think I’m biased, join me for a trip to the grocery store where I have to swat people off my daughter because they are obsessing over her! ;), sweet daughter into our life through the gift of adoption. You can let NIAW breed fear in your life, or ask God how he is going to redeem this struggle. 

 

 


Guest post written by Amanda Hogue. Amanda is a stay-at-home mama to her sweet adopted daughter. She enjoys long conversations over an iced coffee, mystery novels books, and any type of chocolate. You can find her discussing adoption over on instagram and sharing adoption resources at her own corner of I Am Fruitful