M is for Miscarriage

Back in the fall when I first started Periscope, I did a Fertility A-Z series. When we got to M is for Miscarriage, I shared a little about our own 3 losses. In the first few minutes I share statistics to bring awareness and also explain some of the different types of miscarriages, in case you are not familiar! 

Skip ahead to 7 minutes if you want to get to my story.

If you have experienced a miscarriage, you will be so ridiculously encouraged by something my dad sent me (skip ahead to the 21 minute mark). Ya'll, it's really good.

I also share a list of scriptures that brought me comfort during our time of grief, and I've listed them for you below! Check back soon, because I'll be posting a list of 5 scriptures to combat fear of miscarriage!

• Psalm 23
• Psalm 25
• Deut 20:3-4
• Psalm 9:9-10
• Isaiah 43:18-19

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L is for Loss

So many people stay quiet about loss and miscarriage. We want you to know that you're not alone, that we know it's hard, and that you CAN and WILL get through this.

I remember it felt like the breath got knocked out of me when the (not so friendly) tech told me there was only one heartbeat. There were supposed to be two. Twins. Two boys to be exact. And now there was one. And my heart stopped. It was devastating. That was the first of 3 miscarriages, and I keep my story short because I'm writing this for you, not me. This is to help you through your time of loss and tears, and to help you navigate through it.

Here are a few tips (from a girl who's lost 3 precious babies) on how to get through a miscarriage. It's not all-inclusive. But these ideas may help set you in the right direction. There's light at the end of the tunnel, I promise you. Watch the video for the full content.

TIPS TO GET THROUGH MISCARRIAGE

1. Allow yourself to grieve. Miscarriage is downplayed so much in our culture. It's no wonder since we're living in a time and a place where we discard life like kitchen trash. But because loss of life is so completely downplayed by most of the world, we can feel ashamed for grieving (since, after all, "it's no big deal"). It IS a big deal. Grieve. And don't be ashamed. If you're grieving the loss of an infant, my heart breaks for you. Don't rush your grief or put a time frame on it.
2. Get help if you need it! There's NO shame in this! In fact, I commend you, dear friend!
3. Let this struggle bring you closer to your spouse. Communicate! Tell them what you need, specifically.
4. Receive support from friends and family. When they offer, say yes.
5. Don't lose hope in God or your promise!! God is good, and He is faithful!

“Blessed is she who believed that He would fulfill His promise to her.”

— Luke 1:45

Lately on Instagram

K is for Know

I'm continuing to (slowly but surely) post up my Fertility A-Z Series from Periscope in the fall. Today, we're on K is for Know! I felt the Lord put 3 "knows" on my heart to discuss, so watch the video to hear what He put on my heart.

1. No one KNOWS how I feel.
2. How do I KNOW I'll get pregnant?
3. Do you KNOW God? Are you seeking to know who He is and who He is in your situation?

J is for Joy

Continuing our Fertility A-Z Series! Check out this short video! You can skip ahead to about 2 and 1/2 minutes to skip intros.

We're talking about choosing joy, what that looks like, and that it's OKAY to be sad! It's ok to be happy for them and sad for you. Just because you're sad for a day, doesn't mean you're not choosing joy in your season. But what does choosing joy look like?

Romans 15:13 "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

I is for "Infertility" the word

"Words kill, words give life. They're either poison or fruit- you choose." Proverbs 18:21

What are you confessing over your life, situation, family, and fertility? Are your words killing or giving life?? Are they poison or fruit??

Do you call yourself "infertile?" Do you say you are dealing with "infertility?" If so, how often? A lot of us have a stock answer ready for everyone who asks us when we want to have kids, why we don't have kids, Why there's not a sibling yet, etc. It's easy to say "I'm infertile" or "We're dealing with infertility." I want to challenge you to reconsider your vocabulary. Watch the video below for some tips and suggestions for how to change what you say! Feel free to skip ahead to about 2.5min to avoid intros, etc.

Continue saying "I am fruitful!"

G is for God Is...

Hey guys!! Still re-capping my series from the fall on Fertility A-Z. If you missed it, I'm posting all the videos from periscope and much of the content in the blog.

This one is really big for me. Who God is. It's important. It's relevant in our lives and in each of our situations. It's crucial to your faith. So let me ask you this- is there something that you believe about God, but you don't think He will be that way in your life or in your situation? For instance, you believe He is faithful (in general), but when you really think about it, you don't think He will be faithful in the situation you're going through right now. Or what about this one- You know and believe He's a jealous God, but you don't really think He cares if you put Him first or not. Do you believe He's full of compassion, but that you may never experience it? Those are all lies from the enemy and they've got to be dealt with before you can really step into freedom and into the fullness of who God created you to be.

Check out the video (you can feel free to skip ahead to about 2.5min to skip intros/smalltalk).

When I was trying to conceive and I first began journaling my feelings about the whole process, I felt led to make a list of who God Is and what He is like. So I googled a little, I flipped through my Bible a LOT, and began writing. When I'm feeling low on faith, down in the dumps, or feel like I'm losing hope... This list snaps me out of my fog quickly! It's not all-inclusive, and many of these have several more scriptures than I have listed, but it's a good starting place to remind yourself WHO GOD IS. I highly encourage you to take a good long look at this list and ask yourself if there's anything here that you're struggling to believe about God in YOUR life. If you believe these things about God, then choose to believe that He will be this way in your situation as well. He doesn't change!

GOD:

Is Good PSALMS

Is Righteous Ps 116:5

Is Full of Compassion Ex 34:6, Ps 103:8, Ps 111:4

Is Sovereign Is 61:1-3

Is A God of Peace Eph 2:14, 1 Cor 14:33

Is Light 1 John 1:5

Is Love 1 John 4:8, 16

Is Slow to Anger Ex 34:6

Bestowes Favor & Honor Ps 84:11-12

Does not show Favoritism Acts 10:34

Heals Is 59:1

Hears Is 59:1

Fights for Me Josh 23:3, Deut 9:3 Deut 20:4

Bears My Burdens Daily Ps 68:19

Will Not Abandon or Destroy You Deut 4:31

Does Not Withhold Any Good Think From Those Who Walk Uprightly Ps 84:11

Is Faithful Is 4:7, 1 Cor 1:9, 1 Cor 10:13, Ps 100:5, Lam 3:22-23

Is Holy Is 49:7

Is Lord Is 49:23, Ps 114:15

Is Savior Is 49:26

Is My Redeemer Is 49:26

Is A Jealous God Deut 4:24

Is Merciful Deut 4:31

Is My Refuge, Fortress, & Rock Deut 33:27, Ps 46:1, Ps 94:22

Is My Shield & Strength Prov 30:5, Ps 46:1, Ps 73:26

Is My Help Ps 54:4

Is My Comforter Is 51:12

Is The First & The Last Is 48:12, Is 44:6, Rev 1:17

Is Gracious Ps 116:5, 2 Chron 30:9, Ps 84:11

Is My God Forever Ps 48:14

Is My Portion Ps 73:26

E is for Emotions

Women are often labeled as crazy because of our emotions. When you are going through a struggle with fertility, loss, or miscarriage, you DO have so many emotions!! You are not crazy!

Your emotions can change so frequently, especially when you're on hormones and fertility drugs! If you are struggling in this area, please watch this encouraging video! Remember, you are not alone!

Here are the scriptures I referenced in the video:

Prov 29:11 NLT "A [self-confident] fool utters all his anger, but a wise man holds it back and stills it."

Phil 4:6 The Message  "Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life."

D is for Doubt

When I was in the middle of my fertility crisis, there were days I thought I could conquer the world... days I knew FOR SURE that we would get pregnant. Then, there were days that I felt doubt creep in...days I heard the enemy speaking through my thoughts, "I might never get pregnant," "what if I'm never a mom," "there's something wrong with me."

Well my husband and I decided one day to stop asking for our promises in a half-hearted, doubtful way, and to begin claiming the promises of God instead! We began thanking God in advance for the things we didn't see, and man, was that powerful. Please watch the 5 minute clip below for the original video.

As Thanksgiving approaches, it's a great time to begin thanking the Lord for the things you don't see happening yet, for the things you're trusting God for, for the baby you're hoping for. And, of course, fill your mind with truth and not lies by reading the word of God and tossing negative thoughts as far away as you can. Our thoughts are SO powerful, and can affect your health, emotions, and fertility!!

“When we implant God’s word into our minds through our thinking, we fill our brains with the powerful environmental influence of God’s love, which directly impacts our mental and physical health in a positive direction. Talk about a sound mind!”

— Dr. Caroline Leaf

Anytime doubt begins to creep in, anytime you begin thinking, "what if God doesn't do what He said He would," or "God is good but probably won't pull through for me," remind yourself who God is.

God is faithful. God is Holy. God is your Redeemer. God is merciful. God is your refuge and rock. He's your shield and your strength. God is your help. The Bible says He fights our battles for us. God is the one who comforts you. He's righteous. He's full of compassion. God is GOOD, and He will be good in your situation and your life. Don't doubt who He is or that He will be who He is in YOUR life and YOUR situation.

Say "I am Fruitful!!"

C is for Comparison

Playing the comparison game is dangerous, no matter what you're comparing. Your spouse, your possessions, your body, your friends. We all do it.

Everybody compares at some point, but it's dangerous! When you compare yourself to someone else, you're either better than or worse than. Your situation is either better or worse. Or it's harder or easier. There's no in between. It's dangerous because it takes the focus off God and puts it on ourselves. Watch the video below for full content!

Feel free to skip ahead to about 2min 25seconds to skip intros, etc.

One of the dangers of comparing yourself to others (or another's situation) is that you end up in one of two camps: pride or envy. Neither is a good place to be. Try to remember that God has you RIGHT where He wants you. And the grass isn't greener on the other side! It's greener when you accept and embrace who you are in Christ, and you thank Him for what He's done, what He's doing, and what He's going to do in your life!

My challenge to you is this: Thank God for the promise that you don't see yet instead of being ungrateful for the promise that you don't have yet!

If you struggle with comparison, I highly suggest watching this sermon of my pastor, Pastor Robert Morris of Gateway Church in Southlake, TX. It's called The Sin of Comparison, and I am confident that this will give you direction and hope as you navigate this tricky battle. You can watch here:

The Sin of Comparison

Be encouraged!! Your breakthrough will come, and you will be stronger on the other side!! Say, "I am fruitful."

B is for Breakthrough

We're looking back at our first Periscope series, Fertility A-Z, and today we are on B! B is for Breakthrough!

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans and thoughts that I have for you,’ says the Lord, ‘plans for peace and well-being and not for disaster to give you a future and a hope.

Catch the full video here (feel free to skip to the 2 minute mark if you want to get to the main content)

I experienced a spiritual (and I believe physical) breakthrough before I conceived each of my children. The first came when my husband and I decided to be obedient to something (something pretty intimidating and scary) that the Lord asked us to do. He totally took us outside our comfort zone, and I believe our spiritual and physical breakthrough came in part because of our willingness to follow His instructions and be obedient. Watch the video to hear the story!

I also felt I had a breakthrough when I switched journals. Yes. you heard me. But before you run up to Barnes and Noble to buy a new journal... hear me out. The book that I once used to share my heart with the Lord, to write encouraging scriptures, and to thank Him turned into a desperate begging tool. I cried, I scribbled, I wrote about my cycle and every detail of my meds, treatments, and procedures. Every single time I went to God, it was about having a baby. Every time I had a quiet time, I wrote in that book (which was about having a baby). Every time I prayed, I asked for a baby. My relationship with the Lord, which was once beautiful, fulfilling, full of conversation and worship- was now all about me. All about the baby I didn't have. And although I still thanked Him in advance, praised Him, shared my heart... something had changed. So I switched journals. The new one became about more than my desire for a child. I did allow myself to write about my desire for children, but not for long, because we were pregnant soon! God is a jealous God, and I truly believe He wanted me to have my desire. But not until He had my heart.

This is a just a little overview about my perspective and experience with breakthrough. Ask the Lord if there's something He wants you to do, show you, or change your perspective on. Your breakthrough is right around the corner! Keep believing and hoping! And please connect with me wherever you hang out socially! (links below)

 There's more in the short video, and if you enjoy the content, you can join me live on Periscope HERE!